A new holiday: Mike Woods finally admits his column is a waste of time

My hometown paper, The Appleton Post-Crescent is generally a pretty decent small/mid-sized town paper. I’ll never forget the day the final column on the College Ave bridge was blown up so that the bridge could be remade wider. Above the fold, there was a huge photo of the explosion with a very large headline that read “Kaboom!” Awesome.

I put it right up there with the San Francisco Examiner’s post 9/11 front page headline that read simply, “Bastards!”

But there is one thorn in my side about the Post-Crescent, aside that they won’t hire me, and that is Mike Woods. He is billed as an award-winning sports columnist. He blows. Hard.

He’s not funny. He never makes an insightful point. He just fills space.

Today is worth celebrating as Woods finally admits in the first paragraph of his blog today that the rest of the entry is not worth reading. Finally! Here was my reaction to reading today’s entry:

Predicting how the Packers will navigate their schedule the day after it is released is as useless an exercise as a mock draft.

Fuck yeah it is. Especially from such a hopeless homer whose specialty is pointing out the obvious and taking cheap, crappy, unfunny potshots. It’s almost as useless as saying no to Ben Roethlisberger. Zing!

But I need a little exercise, and predicting how they will traverse their schedule is the lesser of two evils. So here we go:

Gah! Why?! If you need some exercise just hit up a treadmill, dude. This type of shit is only interesting in the context of a conversation with your friends.

But alright, maybe he’ll at least provide some insight as to why the Packers will win or lose each game to help me in the case of a friendly argument. He is a traditional journalist after all, of the type who assert their superiority because they have access to the teams and stuff. He should have some great revelations to share. Right?

/reads the rest of the entry

//sees only tired, unfunny jokes and mindless non-reasoning (the Packers will beat the Vikings both times this year! They play them once coming off the bye week so that’s locked down fer sure!)

Goddammit!

If there is no great humor, insights or revelations, then what the hell is the point of Mike Woods? Did he used to be good and just stop trying, like Chris Berman? I mean there is just no effort here. (Like a certain other blog I know)



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About Ken Harris

I like whisky. And whiskey, too. And I like you.
This entry was posted in journalismish, me so angry!, sports! and tagged . Bookmark the permalink.

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